It has been a trying couple of days for Tess and I. It is hard to get down in words exactly what I struggle with because it probably doesn't seem that bad when you read it...but here it goes...I love her but she drives me crazy with all the demands and questions. That's it in a nutshell...I guess it's just not what I ever experienced with my other kids so it's hard for me. From the minute she wakes up and starts arguing about what she will and won't wear, then onto breakfast where she almost always complains about what food, how much or why there isn't a different type of waffle...then nags Cameron because he takes longer to get in the car...she is just plain demanding!! Not in a mean way...in a nagging, whiny way...( oh, man...why you take so long cameron!!) She complains a lot. She seems to have her own idea of how things should be going ( like the first day she skied..when we picked her up she complained that she styed on the bunny hill, that she didn't have poles and that she was hungry) After school yesterday I answered no less than 200 questions, maybe more. Jeff said I should not answer and just tell her to stop...and that if I answer she'll keep coming. It is true, if you open that door she's coming through with force!!. I'm back to Granny's suggestion of a behavior chart to modify this behavior but I'm also trying to understand where it's coming from. It goes beyond the need to know because Jeff and I have noticed that many times it's questions she has asked over and over.(for examlpe.."what's your favorite food mom? What's your favorite color?I have answered those question 100 times easily) It's almost like nervous never ending chatter...she just can't shut up and after hours of it your head FEELS LIKE IT'S GOING TO POP.
So this morning Cameron and I did a skit to act out what the daily "question bombardment" looks like...
Scene 1 cameron sat eating breakfast and we had normal dialog (Is your homework done? Hurry and finish so we can go. Other than that it was quiet)
Scene2 Cameron sat eating breakfast and I fired about 50 questions and complaints at him before he had a chance to answer even a few.
Tess sat and watched. I asked which scene was about her. She said scene 2. I asked her if she understood why we did that. "Yes".
So, off to school they went. I'm sure she'll have 65 questions about it when I pick her up from school!!!
1 comment:
Although our Amelia is still just a baby....she's clearly opinionated and demanding, and possibly strong-willed. My mom says that's why she survived over in Ethiopia: because she's so strong. So...maybe my little story will help you a little bit as you figure out how to best parent Tess. Even though it's so frustrating at times! I think you're doing a great job. God will show you the way!
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